work...

I try my best when I work. I've gotten pretty good at my job in the last couple of weeks. I don't seem as frazzled as I did when I first started working there. I just have one tiny issue...people talking about how horrible I am. Yes I may have tipped you poorly but how was I supposed to know the policy unless someone told me it. Also don't sit there and talk about me when I am kind enough to actually give you the difference that was owed to you when my friends tipped poorly. I'm a nice person but you just brought out the bitch in me. (sorry for the language but I'm upset about this). I'll cover your shift as long as you cover mine and if you don't cover mine after I've covered yours, you are shit out of luck when it comes down to it next time.

Moving on:

Christmas Eve is tomorrow and I'm working a double. Yay! Then I'm driving home to Dallas for a week with friends and family. Can't wait. So to celebrate here is a music video I'm loving.

Missing my Missoula

I woke up to 20 degrees here in Lubbock, Tx a few days ago and thought just for a slight second that I was back in Missoula....but I'm not. I'm still here and still going to Tech. I miss my wonderful sisters so much its nuts. I just wish I could have the best of both worlds like Hannah Montana....I know lame right?

I definitely feel like my heart is torn in two and possibly three because my heart is here with me and my boyfriend in Texas, but it is also in Missoula with my best friends and also overseas with my best friend Dee and all my wonderful Navy friends. This holiday will be hard but I have a feeling I'll be seeing my best friends soon. Especially in January and May.

For now I will chug along and make sure that I do what I have to, to try and pass this semester.

Top Ten Week 2

This week is Classic Christmas Movie week.

1. Miracle on 34th Street (circa 1947)- self explanatory

2. Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas

3. Frosty the Snowman

4. White Christmas- another duh because it is an amazing movie

5. Its a Wonderful Life

6. A Christmas Story

7. A Muppet Christmas Carol- I consider this to be classic cause I grew up watching it during christmas.

8. A Christmas Carol - Patrick Stewart version

9. Prancer

10. The Santa Clause

These are by far some of my favorite ones!!! Enjoy!

Top Ten Week 1

So being as Thanksgiving is next week and Christmas is only a month away from that I decided to list my favorite things about this time of year. I'll start off with my top ten favorite songs. So here goes:

1. "I want a hippopotamus for Christmas" and it has to be the original version cause there ain't anything that can touch Gayla Peevey on this song!

2. "Christmas Time" by Hanson. It may not be a popular Christmas song but it definitely an inspirational one.

3. "White Christmas" this one is important cause it is Bing at his best!

4."Winter Wonderland" Frank Sinatra is pretty fantastic!

5. "This Christmas" Chris Brown version. I know that some people may not like the guy but he does an amazing version of this song!

6. "Santa Baby" Eartha Kitt style! Although the "Santa Baby" version in the movie This Christmas (with Chris Brown and Columbus Short) was amazing too.

7. "O Holy Night" by *Nsync is probably one of the best versions. (A Cappella)

8. "I'll Be Home for Christmas" Rascal Flatts. (A Cappella) I don't even need to explain this one!

9. "I saw Momma kissing Santa Claus" Reba McEntire...there are other versions that are just as good but I had to give some credit to my Queen of Country.

10. Lastly, but surely not the least of my favorites is...."Up on the Housetop" George Strait cause if you are going to have the Queen, you definitely need the King!

Well I'm going to make my Christmas Playlist. I hope you will enjoy these songs just as much as I do!

Next time it will be favorite classic Christmas movies!

Raining cats and more cats...

What you guys may not know about me is that I have taken 3 cats into my home. My mother had 2 of them and found out that her boyfriend is allergic. Well over the summer I acquired another, her name is Byntly. The oldest is Emma and the "middle child" is Cali. They are very energetic, but can be a little on the obnoxious side. My mafia (this will make sense later) of cats cracks my mom up and I'm hoping you guys will find it entertaining as well.

We all know I've been addicted to Sweet Tea since I was about 5 years old. I probably go through a gallon every few days. Well my littlest cat (Byntly) has decided she likes the taste for Sweet Tea as well. I was laying in bed sometime last week, most likely Thursday cause that's the only day I've had available to just chill in a

while, and she jumps up on the bed and crawls over me to get to my glass of Sweet Tea. She begins to slurp it down with out even realizing that I'm laying there watching what she is doing. She will stare you down as you eat your food, like she is begging for food or something. She crawls under the covers with me to sleep, but if you try and pet her when she doesn't want to be petted she will attack! She is also the cat that likes to up root my plants and keep doing it after I re-plant them. She is my "dog", be

cause she takes my socks and hides them. I'm down to like 5 pairs of socks because I can't find the others, thanks to her!

Cali is my attention whore. She will be up in your face no matter how many times you swat her and tell her to back off. She also likes to not use the litter box if it is in the least bi

t dirty. I mean like she is fickle. She loves to leave presents for me when I've missed one day of cleaning the litter box. She is my most outspoken one as well. She will cry and cry for attention its ridiculous. Just this past Saturday she was crying and I was like "why are you crying? I already fed you guys...." *light bulb goes on* "you must need water....my bad."

Emma, my mother's cat, she also acts like a dog somewhat because she responds when her name

is called. It also has to be my mother's voice doing it, not mine. So when I'm Skyping with my mom she will stop mid sentence and start calling her cat which in turn brings the cat running and getting up in my face. Emma was a rescue cat (pretty much all the cats were rescues) but she is a tad bit different. My mom walked into a Pet Smart and saw her, unfortunately fell in love. Emma was rescued by the ASPCA from a house of like 100 other cats. She bit the guy trying to get her prepared for my mom and ended up in quarantine for, I believe, 3 weeks. She is a very shy and quiet cat. She only makes noise when its feeding time. She is also a clean freak. She hates the smell of the litter box and wipes her feet on the floor after every use. She also loves to fling litter out of the box....it thrills me....let me tell you.

On to the Mafia analogy....Emma = Godfather, Cali = godfather's skanky whore, and Byntly = the new guy joining. Because Byntly is still a kitten she likes to play but Emma hates her! Byntly will attack and all you will see is Emma's ears go straight back and she will be the biggest &*!#$ in the world. Cali has begun to attack Emma as well, which is kind of hilarious. Two cats ganging up on one.... I'll have to tape it and post it the next time it happens.

Well I'm not sure you wanted to know all about my cats but there you go.

College

I thought it would be easy and I could handle it but obviously I can't grasp it. I'm going to fail 2 classes this semester and I don't have any way of preventing it. I'm stressing big time. I'm going to fall farther behind in school. Great just what I needed. Oh well might as well keep chugging along!

Other than that I had the best weekend with my wonderful boyfriend. I saw Due Date which is hilarious and I definitely suggest that everyone go and see it, especially if you loved the Hangover!

"Reasons to be Pretty" was pretty fantastic! Good job everyone! Now working on crew for "Anton and Show Business"!!!!

Still have to memorize food for OTB and have to prepare my monologues for Auditioning class. This week is gonna kill me probably.

I hope things get better soon.

Just do it?!

I'm just trying to do what I feel is right for me and I'm not ready yet. Saying "just do it and get it over with" doesn't help either. I'm terrified and I can't help that. I just want to be normal but unfortunately normal isn't possible for me. I can't "just do it", my head is mental blocked. I'm terrified. Maybe it'll never happen for me. I'm okay with that. I'm okay with being me, the same me for the rest of my life. I just don't think you will be. I'm not holding you back. If its too much for you to handle then you know what you have to do...

I just wish people could understand me and what the true issue is....not the issue they think it is.

I can't let what other people think get to me, but to have your own mother think this way kills me!

Positivity!

Its hard not to be negative in the world today. As I look back at just my day today I've realized I have said hate about 5 or 6 times. In just one day that is a lot of 'hate'. My negativity rating is at a Debbie Downer today....I feel bad for my wonderful boyfriend, cause he has to put up with my wonderful negativity.

Tomorrow I'm going to try and be a little more positive. I can't guarantee it but I will definitely try. I guess I've just been a little agitated lately. Maybe after I go and have dinner and work out I'll be in a better mood.

Best Blog Ever!

I've recently learned about "Sh*t my dad says" blog and the guy who wrote the twitter feeds and now book that has been published. I absolutely adore his dad's sayings.

If you haven't heard anything about him his name is Justin Halpern and he just released his book with it fully loaded of all his dad's sayings over the years. It is probably the best thing I've come across on Twitter in a long time. (Before I go any further, I do have a twitter account and it is only to follow my friend Lauren Alexander who is a musician and a few other people. Other than that I am not a big twitter person. I don't update my twitter every five seconds and I don't check it that often either)

As for Justin Halpern's website, it is shitmydadsays.com and you can also find his twitter account under shitmydadsays. I think you'll enjoy it.

Another great blog would be my friend's, Emily Gray. It is entitled "Gray Matter". She is pretty darn funny herself.

As for my life I've never been funny on paper. I usually am funny when it comes to talking to people. Plus I ramble a lot in letters to my friends (you can ask them and they'll say its true. Right, Kenny?! LOL)

Well if you read my blog this one time, at least it will lead you to some pretty awesome other blogs! Enjoy!

No Regrets

"To love yourself is the beginning to life long affair" ~Oscar Wilde

I have NO regrets in life. Regrets just lead to "What ifs" and what would be that point of that. I am very happy to admit that I have the strongest women surrounding me in my life. Unfortunately one does not think she is strong enough to handle anything. She is my godmother, and she has been through a bitter divorce and many other struggles in her life. She is an amazing woman. She has no idea what she has to offer to the world.

If there is one thing I would want anyone to take away from me writing this, it would be to love yourself. Until you begin to love yourself and rely on yourself, you will never find a man worth your time.

I did not have a "boyfriend" until I was 22. It only lasted 3 months but I'm glad it didn't go any further. I was taught as a young girl that you should be able to make yourself happy before you can make anyone else happy. Until then you shouldn't even try looking because all you are going to do is become someone, that someone else wants you to be. Yes I'm opinionated and I tell it like it is. I have morals and values that I am not going to give up just because a guy with green eyes and dark brown hair tells me to. That would be why the first "boyfriend" and I broke up. I also became someone I wasn't happy with being. I had given my all and become someone completely different. I stopped being strong and confident. I relied on him to tell me what I was doing and how I should feel doing it. When that relationship ended I was devastated, but when I look back now....it was the best thing that could have ever happened to me.

I am now in a wonderful relationship with a man that I absolutely adore and can't wait to see where it takes me. I have also gotten back to who I am and who I'll always be, and he is happy with who I am. He won't try and change me. He knows that if he does, he'll lose me. I also know that nothing in life is guaranteed so I'm going to live every moment and appreciate every kiss/hug.

No Regrets.

Pretty Girl Swag...

So after almost a month of not talking to my ex guess who calls....If you guessed Steven Spielberg...you would be incorrect and I wish! Nope, my ex calls me. Any other time before I started dating my honey, I wouldn't have thought anything of it. I've always been the type of person to keep people in my life, unless they did something so wrong that it was unforgivable. Gray didn't do anything but say one thing and mean another. (He was a very confusing person.) So I answered, not thoroughly understanding why this man was calling me when we haven't been together since January, but we talked. I still don't know what he wants from me. I know he was trying to get a rise out of me and because I'm a new person, he didn't. He still seems to think he knows me...poor guy. He has no clue. I don't hate him, that chapter of my life is over and I have moved on and met a wonderful man. He honestly seems to think I hate his guts... If I did, would I be answering his phone call?!

I just honestly feel bad for the woman he has under his spell right now. I was there, not too long ago. Gray can make you feel like you are the only woman in his sights, unfortunately that is a lie...He may say those girls are the ones who are always talking to him, but no...he is keeping them around to have backups when you guys break up. Whatever, it is no longer my business. All I hope for, is your happiness and hopefully he won't screw you over....I'm thankful for the fact that we are done, it wasn't meant to be for us.

No worries, my day was great overall. Poolside with a book and my cousins, along with my best friend Tricia. Watched Bounty Hunter, funny movie. McFlurry eaten, Chiloso for dinner. Then tv with Amy and Tricia. Workout went well, I ran a mile without stopping. Weight loss is up to 8 pounds. :-) Can't wait for Ryan to see me! August couldn't come sooner.

Enjoying Another New Beginning....

As most of you know I moved to Montana two years ago to get a fresh start after having entered the military and being discharged. I have since moved back home to the beautiful state of Texas. I will be attending Texas Tech in the Fall and will be double majoring in Business and Acting.

I am not witty, nor am I charming. I am just a open and honest person. Pretty much, this blog is hopefully going to help me and you learn and understand life through my eyes.

If you didn't already know I was in a major car accident a little over a year ago. A 76 year old man going the wrong way down the highway clipped the driver's side of my car, deploying the side air bag. He then kept going down the highway crossing the grassy median and making a u-turn to come back the way he had come and continuing down the highway until a state trooper caught up with him. What I do not understand is, how the state trooper could later come up to my hotel room in Bozeman, Mt and tell me that it was an "honest mistake". How is going down the highway the wrong way at 9 o'clock in the morning, an "honest mistake"? Anyway with all that I have been in physical therapy for a little under a year. From what I am told I will always live with this pain. It is how I deal with it that will matter most.

My journey to gaining my life back began a few months after my ex and I broke up. I found myself searching for the me I had lost in the few months I had been with him. So I began to climb Mount Sentinel everyday for 3 months. Rain or Shine I was up on that mountain. I learned strength and understanding for things I could not control. I began to understand what I needed to do to find me. I still have the back injury from the car accident and I'm still in a certain amount of pain all the time. The pain has gone down considerably. I continue to work through the pain. I will constantly be appreciating the things I used to do without the pain.

I'm moving out the Lubbock Texas for the fall semester. From what I am to understand, there isn't a lot to do out there. I am told that there is Paloduro Canyon, but that is about 2 hours north. I guess I will be making an excursion up there at least once a month. I'm a very active person, I'm just glad the accident didn't take that away from me fully. So here is to another new beginning. I've had at least 2 of them so far. Third time is the charm, right?

The part I think you'll find most interesting out of this blog is the fact that I ramble and I mean I jump around considerably! So try and enjoy it. I have my bad days just like most, but I try and remain positive about life these days....

<3